It's a line guaranteed to bring laughter and a smile to my face. It's a moment shared with my dad and brother, of a childhood road trip gone bad.
I spent several July trips on the road with my brother and dad. It was our thing. As soon as school was out, dad would get his "week". (Divorced family) Literally, the school bell rang, and the three of us would pile into his vehicle (the 80s Citation, the mid-life crisis Audi, or the 'we're-doing-this-in-style-and-comfort 80s Dodge van') and head out.
Dad gave us each a roll of quarters as our own gas station/hotel vending machine money. We could buy Pepsi or play pinball any time we wanted. We had a map, a couple pillows, a 2-man tent, an electric fry pan and some sort of mascot. I remember one year's mascot as a plastic Gremlin, from that movie we all loved.
There was always a theme tape too. You know, cassettes. Like an old school car radio, Anyone born after 1990.... just never mind, or google it if you're really interested. Huey Lewis & the news provided the soundtrack for a few vacations. If you want to make my dad smile... and bring a happy tear to his eye, play "Heart of Rock n Roll." Gets him every time.
Some years we'd head south (like to the Black Hills, South Dakota), other times west. I don't really remember an eastern vacation. Though we did go to Flin Flon, MB together, so I know we did north.
Anyways, this one time we were heading west. We had heard about this dinosaur place in Alberta that had just opened. Our plan was simple.... drive....camp....laugh.... go home when Keith gets sick. LOL Each trip had the very same formula! No pre-booked hotels, no agenda.... just some quarters, some bologna, a map, some ball gloves and as many rest stops as necessary. There were a couple years when we lived large. We had a screened dining tent that dad would put over the picnic table to keep the bugs away. I always thought we were rich... a dining tent for our campsite... rich. That's just how I felt in the moment. Sweet eh?
So after a few days on the road we hit the land of dinosaurs, Drumheller Alberta. Problem is, we weren't the only ones who had travelled to see this place. There were no hotels with vacancies in the small town experiencing a tourist boom. (If you build it they will come.) So there I was, probably 14 years old, with my map and my CAA tour book trying to find us a campground. When that didn't work, we thought we'd splurge on a hotel but every place we stopped was sold out. Imagine our surprise and frustration. This was our first time ever hitting a big bunch of "no." My dad was tired of driving. It was getting dark, and late, and we still didn't have a place to stay. So we were looking for the next small town of possibilities and that's how we ended up at a sketchy (repeat SKETCHY) motel in East Coulee.
Dad had to go into the town saloon, through those crazy western shutter doors, to look for the innkeeper. Keith and I stayed in the locked car. Me... with a screwdriver in hand. After way too much time had passed, I decided I was going in to rescue my dad. 11-year-old Keith, wasn't going to let me go alone. I put the screwdriver in my little purse and we were nervously heading to the saloon. That's when dad appeared on the sidewalk with the hotel room key on the plastic tag. (Remember those? Then you too, are old!) We were saved!
I remember that night. We got up to the room and we could still hear the bar music pounding. Dad decreed that there would be no baths. (Spiders in the bathtub made that an easy call). Everyone would sleep in their clothes, the chair would go up against the door, and we would be on the road at sun up.
Good news is that it didn't look that sketchy in the morning. Just more like a sad, abandoned town where businesses had closed and residents had chosen low taxes rather than town improvements.
But that was our night in East Coulee. We look back and laugh. I think that's also the time we started using gas station payphones to call ahead for reservations, though that might have been just a co-incidence. (Again those quarters came in handy!)
Those were good times. Very simple trips, but we sure had a lot of laughs and a lot of chipmunks as temporary campsite pets. It was a time when a hotel pool was a big deal, and we ate our campfire hot dogs with just plain mustard. I wish I had more pictures, but it was also a time when my little square camera had a manual wind, a flashbulb, and it was a splurge to get a roll of film with 24 exposures.
Those trips sure taught me life skills though. And even though I take my own kids on pretty fancy trips, I always make sure to include a sketchy detour.... for old times sake. Kidding. My sketchy detours are a result of well meaning plans gone bad too. It sure adds colour and makes for better stories. And it is why I always say... laugh and keep going. There is no such thing as a perfect vacation. Don't let a wrong turn ruin the trip. Sometimes the wrong turns make for the best stories, and memories.
XOXOXO to my dad, for giving us his time and his best road trips, and those quarters!
Happy Father's Day.
